You already have the grey avatar.
All you need to do now is upload a new photo.
I am still having glitches in my profile as well. I am getting tons of private messages but without the usual green dot notification so now I have to actually open the messages section to find them.
There are multiple moderators on this forum which are here every working day and sometimes on weekends but rarely post publicly or answer messages.
I think that their job is mainly to review new user’s accounts and threads, put topics into correct categories and similar.